The #MeToo movement is empowering women, and may be confusing for some of us men… especially in the realm of dating and intimacy. How can we be sure we are acting with integrity and respect? Should we be strong and supportive? Sensitive and passive? What’s the real gist of it all?
We should be who we really are and stop playing roles.
What this world really needs is more men being true to who you really are. A man who is kind, caring, desires sex; and, at the same time, be willing to have a woman’s back. We are a needed gift in this world. A true man gets to be everything that he is, where he gets to look in the mirror in the morning and like the person looking back at him. Where he is honoring himself and everything that he is, while also honoring everyone around him, especially those with whom he is in a relationship.
Here are a couple tips for creating more ease with all of this.
Getting Out of Need
What if you no longer had to focus on how wrong you were? What if you didn’t have to fix anything or try to figure out what to improve to have a better relationship?
Oftentimes, we associate intimacy with sex or intimate relationships; yet most of the time, intimacy is not about sex at all. It’s actually about a caring, kindness, presence, vulnerability and generosity that allows you to be with others. The only way to really have intimacy is to be real, transparent. And the only way to be transparent is to be yourself.
In order to invite intimacy into your life and into your relationships, you have to let go of the BS. You have to refrain from putting on a front or trying to be someone you’re not in order to impress others. Try it; try just being real with those around you. When you realize that putting on a front is actually a total hindrance to your relationships—and you let people see who you really are—you create a space of being and a space of communion with everything and everyone around. In a way, nobody needs to be seen as wrong anymore. Nobody needs to be separated from, and nobody needs to be judged.
Getting into Intimacy
It doesn’t matter what the level of that relationship is—whether it’s a friend, family member, co-worker or partner—when you have real, unabashed intimacy, all the need for approval goes away. All the need of having to have someone goes away. All the need of having anyone as a completion of you goes away.
The beautiful part about that is when the need to be fulfilled or completed is gone, then the possibilities can show up in your world with much ease.
You’re invited to a different possibility for your life and the world. One where you can get out of need and into intimacy with you!
P.S. For the full article, please visit The Good Men Project and check it out here. Grateful for you!